Monday, May 2, 2011

I feel sad enough to eat myself, Osama bin laden dead.

A new Zealand man struggling with derp-pression cut off his own finger and cooked it with vegetables than ate them, joining only eight identified such cases of self cannibalization. The 28 year old man amputated and ate his finger without testing for any substance abuse or impaired reality.

In other news, as I'm sure your heard, Osama Bin Laden was killed in a mansion in Abbottabad, Pakistan, outside of the capital Islamabad. Working without Pakastani knowledge or permission, a team of over 9000 navy seals working with the CIA raided his compound using two roflcoptors, to which a firefight ensued with three men and a woman being killed along with Bin Laden. Bin Laden's body was taken into US custody and carried onto a ship heading for guantanamo bay, when Bin Laden found out about the destination he said "fuck this" and jumped off the side into the sea. Ending the war on terror forever... the end...

20 comments:

  1. I don't think the war on terror is over, not by a long shot.

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  2. Well of course it's not, I was being sarcastic.

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  3. The way i look at it, the war on terror will not be solved ever by killing, you would have to acctually talk something over with al-queda or more will just keep being born, its a 1-dies-1-is-born situation. To be fair, the chances of the USA negotiating is 1 in a million but meh, it will go on for a long time yet.

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  4. Finally. 10 years. Not over though.

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  5. the way i see it, there's something called blowback, unintended consequences for specific actions. One of the reasons stated in the 9/11 commission for the attacks on the world trade center was that we had bases in Saudi Arabia, which we eventually withdrew from in 2003. And the 1998 Embassy bombing, was eight years to the day that US troops were sent to Saudi Arabia. So by the US going over and fighting wars in the middle east it gives the people incentive to join the terrorist and fight US.
    We would be much safer if we just have a non-interventionist foreign policy protect our borders here at home.

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  6. it wont end ever, his death will only lead to reprisals but it had to be done

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  7. Humorous take on the raid, I'll post my thoughts in the next few hours. It's a bit deeper than most realize.

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  8. The war on terror will NEVER be over :(

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  9. "now those terrorists are going to be riled up like a nest of angry hornets. that's why you need to approve my proposed additions to the patriot act, and you need me to protect you for another glorious term."
    i call it. by the end of the week, we're going to have another "imminent" threat that secures Obama for the next election

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  10. Over 9000 marines, incredible

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  11. osama is just another figure in the show and will be replaced by another soon...

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  12. Finally they killed him! 10 years tracking, what a success.

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  13. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  14. Im still thinking 9/11 was an internal job, so where's the justice?

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  15. Yeah the killing of a figure head isn't going to do anything for America besides a second-long ego-boost.

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  16. 10 years to found Osama, i cant believe xD

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  17. I think there is a lot that the U.S. government isn't telling us. Also the story about the man eating his own finger was very curious indeed. Cheers! +follow

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  18. Successful self-cannibilization? Successful? There's no 'success' in that story!!!

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